Minivan: Fully Loaded

Today when I was out getting the RV ready for our trip, I looked over at the house and noticed a couple of sticks (small branches) up on the patio overhang (near one of our upper windows).  Given Tanner had been out playing with a stick earlier, I knew immediately he had done it.  So I called him over to me and here is how it went down:

Me: Why did you do that?  (pointing at the sticks)

Tanner: I didn't put that up there !

Me: Tanner, don't lie to me.  I saw you with it earlier.  It didn't fly up there on it's own now did it?

(knowing he was now busted, and not wanting to get in more trouble for the lie he just told)

Tanner:  Dad, I said I didn't "put" it up there.  I flung it up there!  And Cailyn did it too!

Talk about a quick save on a technicality!  Here I was upset that he had been throwing rather large sticks up near some windows, and yet I found myself feeling almost proud of him...it was weird.

Milee has been such a cute big sister.  I have been shocked at how much she has wanted to pitch in and help.  And not just with the fun parts either.  She changes diapers, helps with baths - you name it.  Heck she may have even passed me on total diapers changed since Ciera was born.  And all I can say is "You go girl!".

About a month before the school year ended Milee was presented with the opportunity to attend a "young authors" writing workshop. The title of this post was the workshop theme.  The goal was to help the kids realize the possibilities that writing has to offer, and to help excite and inspire them to become young authors. Since each student was allowed to bring an adult guest along, Milee asked me to attend.

This was quite an experience.  Prior to the workshop, each kid was given a list of classes and visiting authors that they could sign up for. I had never heard of any of the authors that visited, but many of the kids, including Milee, knew a few of them from books they had been reading in school.  Each author was apparently well known and had more than a single book in publication.  So Milee made her activity selections, which consisted of two writing classes and two talks hosted by a couple of the guest authors.  This was basically an all day event.  We spent an hour in each class with an hour for lunch. 

The first author we spent time with was born in India and immigrated to the united states when she was very young.  She talked about her childhood and the struggles she had growing up as a minority in her school.  She used an overhead projector and gave a presentation with lots of pictures.  I am not sure the kids found it very inspiring (or entertaining), as I think they may have been a little too young to grasp the concept of how hard it was for her to face rejection as she did, especially considering all her other struggles growing up.  At least I didn't get the impression that Milee enjoyed that particular class.

The second class was my favorite.  It was a writing exercise and was taught by AnnRené Joseph, the current Arts Program Supervisor for the Office of the Superintendent of Public Instruction (OSPI) here in the state of Washington.  To translate, she is in charge of all the dance, music, theatre, and visual arts (curriculum, instruction, and assessment) for grades K-12 here in Washington.  I absolutely loved this class.  The theme was "Your Life is an Artwork in Progress" and she spent nearly the entire hour performing poetry and song - it was great.  Right off she introduced herself (in song) and then went around the room having every student (and parent) sing "My name is ___" and give your name.  I expected a least one or two kids to refuse, but they all sang out their name, even if it was pretty quiet for some.  It was actually the parents that held back the most, but I made sure to give it my best and AnnRené gave me an "A".  :)

Overall, AnnRené was such a personality, and I just had to capture some of it to share with you later.  Unfortunately all I had was Jody's little point-n-shoot Elph camera that could take video - so I captured what I could.

Isn't she fun?  Milee was right there in front if you didn't notice.  While she won't admit it now, I think she really liked her as well.

I don't recall much of the 3rd class.  It was another writing exercise that had the students practice writing something from the perspective on an inanimate object.  The kids all seemed to enjoy the class and the teacher was pretty good.

The last class/talk was with author Paul Owen Lewis and he was such a good speaker.  He really did a great job of describing his journey to become an author, which didn't really start for him until he was over 30 years old.  In fact it was inspired when he himself attended a writing workshop with one of his kids.  He talked about his childhood and the desire he always had as a kid to write and illustrate, he just never fully realized it and wasn't ever pushed or inspired to pursue it back then.  The way he spoke, and the energy he brought to the presentation he gave was really awesome.  I haven't ever considered writing on any serious level, but he sure made a compelling case to consider it.  Any kid that may have had a goal or dream to pursue it should have really loved hearing him.

By the end of the day I'd had a blast.  I was inspired most by AnnRené, and when I arrived home I announced to the kids the new request rule.  Essentially, if they want something from me, they have to ask me in song.  Isn't it brilliant?!  The more effort they put into it, the more likely I am to give them the answer they want.   Milee isn't a fan, but the other two kids have played along.  Tanner will do anything to get game cube time - even sing his head off.  And Cailyn just loves being cute and enjoys singing anyway so it was no big deal for her.

We haven't stuck to the rule or enforced it much, but on occasion, especially when they want to really improve their odds, the two younger kids will sneak up to me and let loose their harmonic request.  I have to say, it works more often than not...

Today was my last day at work for a full month.  I am taking my 4 weeks of paid paternity leave that I didn't take when Ciera was born.  Looking forward to a little unwinding and hopefully some fun vacationing.

A couple weeks ago I got to attend a Daddy-Daughter church activity with Milee.  The theme - Nerd Night.  Yep, we had to dress up in "nerd" fashion.  Being the All-American jock that I am I knew I had my work cut out for me.  I mean, what do I know about being a "nerd" ?  Well, we did our best.  The only thing matching on us is the blue tape keeping our glasses together. (The picture below isn't very great, sorry).

It was quite the evening.  We both got to learn new and fun things together.  For me, I got to learn how to paint her finger nails green and pink!  She got to learn how to tie a neck tie, and even attempted to "shave" me during a lesson on "how to shave your father's face".  This particular lesson involved real shaving cream, an actual dad's face, and a large popsicle stick to simulate the "razor".  They waited until the last minute to tell us about the popsicle stick and man was I getting worried!  Oh and to top it all off, they blind folded the girls!!  Yeah, as I was the only father with actual facial hair, the other dads all managed to walk away with little trauma.  I on the other hand had shaving cream smashed and embedded into my beard...and before long it was itching and sticky.  Milee thought it was hilarious.

In all we had fun and when they handed out awards we took home the "Nerdiest Attitude" award. This award is the blue head-visor thingy I am proudly wearing around my neck. Milee is an over-achiever and actually put it on her head.

Me: Want to come and spend a day at work with me sometime this summer?

Tanner: And do what?

Me: You can work on computers and stuff with me.

Tanner:  I don't know how. I am not good at computers.  Is it hard?

Me: It can be.  You need to know math really well.

Tanner: Oh, so it is like playing a math game?  All day?  And they pay you?!?

Background:  Tanner has these computer based math games we have him play sometimes to practice his math.

We all love to snuggle her.

I think I need to just break down and buy a new beard trimmer.  Apparently I am not going to find the one I lost.  Actually, it isn't the trimmer I lost, it is the battery charger for it.  The trimmer is simply dead and needs charged.  I am pretty sure I packed the trimmer and charger when I flew down for Ben's funeral.  Almost positive I even used the trimmer while I was there (it's all a bit of a blur now).  Regardless, it is gone and I have not used this fine trimmer in at least two months now - maybe longer. 

I am starting to scare the kids.  The dog is a little too friendly.  And with the weather warming up it is just too hot to have all this fur.

I know I will find the missing one the day after I buy a replacement.....

When she wants to be, she can sure be a cutie!  This was her way of asking very politely to be removed from her car seat.

Come on Dad!  I am being cute, pick me up!

Fine, I'll just go with what I know works.

Or CC&R’s as they are referred to commonly.  These are the rules you agree to when you buy a home that is part of a developed community.  These communities implement an HOA (Home Owner’s Association), and the HOA sets forth the CC&R’s for the community.  Essentially, these are detailed guidelines for what you are allowed to do to “your” property.  Violate these rules and you can be fined.  Fail to pay the fine and you could even lose your home! 

It seems this (CC&R's) is a pretty common practice these days, especially up here in western Washington.  When we first moved up here, owning a home was very high on our list of goals.  Financially it wasn’t an option and for the first couple years, as our family grew, we apartment hopped.  And living in apartments can be rough.  Not only are you throwing away money each month on rent, but you really cannot do anything to make it “your home”.  Often there is little or no yard, and modifications are pretty strict. 

So while we served our time in apartments, we (mostly Jody) casually shopped for houses.  It was more like doing our homework really.  Determine what we like and don’t like etc.  But during all this it was always just assumed that once we bought it - it was ours.  If I wanted to modify it in some fancy or lame way, it was my choice – I own it.  Right?

Apparently not.  At least not like we had always dreamed.  When we purchased our first home, it wasn’t until we had already progressed well into the buying process that we were first introduced to CC&R’s.  It was almost a deal breaker instantly.  Jody was shocked and very upset that she couldn’t build that nice little white picket fence she always dreamed of when she owned her own home.  According to the rules at the time, we could only install specific fencing, with specific materials, and it had to be a specific height.  Oh, and we needed to get written permission first.

We could have walked away, but we really liked the house, and the ball was already rolling.  We saw home ownership on the horizon so we decided to just live with the restrictions.  And as it turned out, the “police” that enforce the rules didn’t really seem to care all that much about most “violations”.  Most people never bothered to ask permission, and so long as you didn’t up and paint your house chartreuse green, you didn’t get any complaints about external modifications.  In general, people used common sense and kept their place in decent shape. This therefore left us with an impression that CC&R’s were more of a general “guideline” rather than a hard rule.  Should someone in the neighborhood clearly do something egregious, the CC&R’s would be there for the community to use as a means of correcting the problem.

Clearly this was short sighted on our part.  And for the three years we lived in that house we did whatever we wanted.  Externally we didn’t do much besides some basic landscaping.  And as our family continued to grow (we gained a 3rd child and a Grandma), and our accumulation of “stuff” continued to grow, the desire for a bigger house also began to grow.  Jody happily began to house shop and we soon came across the new house development called “The Farm at Woodscreek”.

We instantly fell in love with the Quadrant homes.  They offered tons of space, and we got to experience pretty closely what it is like to build your own home.  They offer the basic floor plan options for the community, and you get to pick all the various options you want made/installed.  It was both stressful and lots of fun to watch your house slowly materialize before you over the course of 2 months.  We couldn’t wait to get into the new home.

And of course, the new community also had CC&R’s.  We knew this going in, and we didn’t think much of it based on past experience.  Heck, the rules in place at the time we bought had been outlined by the builder and were overall pretty lax.  It wasn’t really even a concern point for us – we signed the papers and the house was constructed.

A year afterwards, the entire community development was complete, and the HOA (currently managed by the builder) was pawned off to a local management company.  Meetings were held, board of directors nominated, and a new HOA was established.  And this one meant business.  How I wish I had gotten involved early on and learned better who the key players in all this would end up being.  Had I known how bad it would get...

Yep, Jody and I just spent literally all weekend attempting to correct our reported CC&R violations.  Most of which we had to speculate because the certified letter we received wasn’t very specific outside of “lawn maintenance, and weed control”.  Considering there was few weeds and I always mow the lawn, we speculate the inspector(s) took more issue with the front flower display Jody had put in place.  You see, some of the flowers looked like weeds.  At least to me anyway.  The actual flowers hadn’t bloomed yet, and some had grown a little out of control.  Even I had to admit, it didn’t look great. But it wasn’t bad.  Certainly wasn’t bringing down the value of any home nearby. 

But if we didn’t fix our violations in seven days from the post date on the letter, it was $150 fine and or legal action.  And this isn’t the first time we have had an issue.  Anytime we have anything out of “code” when the inspection crew makes their rounds – we get a letter.  Once I had our utility trailer parked in our driveway for just two days and we got a letter.  If you don’t properly ask permission to do something to your landscaping, you get a letter.  Have a relative pass away, and a baby arrive, and therefore your time pretty much tied up dealing with life - you get a letter.  It is ridiculous.

There is little doubt that we will be selling this place in the next few years at this point.  I am all for keeping our house in order, but the constant oversight and harassment, not to mention the need to get everything approved - it's just too annoying.  I am supposed to own this place, but it feels more like an apartment or a condo. 

If you are in the market for a new home, check the CC&R’s.  Read them entirely.  Get an agent to clarify any questions you may have.  Then after you move in,  attend any meetings if rules or management companies are going to be changed, and be completely ready to invest time dealing with reported issues. 

After all, if you don’t keep the landlord happy, you might get booted off your property.